jeu 26 mai 2011

L'oeuf, par Andy Weir

26 05 2011

J'ai trouvé par hasard cette très courte nouvelle, et je l'ai tellement aimée que j'ai ressenti le besoin de la partager. Je l'ai donc traduite.

Après avoir fini, au moment de poster cet article, j'ai recherché l'auteur de cette nouvelle sur internet, et je suis tombé sur son site. Et là, j'ai constaté qu'elle avait déjà été traduite ;)

Du coup, vous pourrez comparer mon travail avec celui d'Alexandrine Latendresse (quel joli nom).


Tu étais en train de rentrer chez toi quand tu es mort.

Un accident de voiture. Rien de particulièrement remarquable, mais mortel, néanmoins. Tu laisses derrière toi une femme, et deux enfants. Tu n'as pas souffert. Les secours ont tenté l'impossible pour te sauver, mais sans succès. Ton corps était si terriblement brisé que c'est mieux ainsi, crois-moi...

Et là, tu m'as rencontré.

« Alors... Que s'est-il passé ? » tu as demandé. « Où suis-je ? »

« Tu es mort, » j'ai dit, du ton dont on dit des banalités. Aucun intérêt à faire dans la dentelle.

« Il y avait... un camion ? Un dérapage... »

« Ouaip, » j'ai dit.

« Je... Je suis mort ? »

« Ouaip. Mais ne t'inquiète pas. Tout le monde meurt", j'ai dit.

Tu as regardé autour de toi. Rien. Une étendue de rien. Juste toi et moi. “Quel est cet endroit ?” as-tu demandé. “Est-ce que c'est le paradis ?”

“Plus ou moins,” j'ai dit.

“Est-ce que vous êtes Dieu ?” tu as demandé.

“Oui,” j'ai répondu. “Je suis Dieu.”

“Mes enfants... ma femme,” tu as dit.

“Oui, et bien quoi ?”

“Est-ce qu'ils vont bien s'en sortir ?”

“C'est ce que j'aime à voir,” j'ai dit. “Tu viens de mourir, et ton premier souci est pour ta famille. C'est bien, ça me plait.”

Tu m'as regardé avec fascination. À tes yeux, je ne ressemblais pas à Dieu. Juste à un homme quelconque. Ou à une femme. Un exemple d'autorité, peut-être, plus du genre instituteur que Tout-Puissant.

“Ne t'inquiète pas,” j'ai dit. “Ils vont s'en sortir. Tes enfants se souviendront de toi comme de quelqu'un de parfait sous tous les angles. Ils n'ont pas eu le temps de développer du mépris pour toi. Ta femme va pleurer, c'est sur, mais au fond elle sera secrètement soulagée. Pour être honnête, votre mariage battait de l'aile. Si ça peut te consoler, elle se sentira très coupable de se sentir soulagée.”

“Oh,” tu as dit. “Et maintenant ? Est-ce que je vais au paradis, ou en enfer, ou quoi ?”

“Ni l'un ni l'autre,” j'ai dit. “Tu vas être réincarné.”

“Ah,” tu as dit. “Alors, les hindous avaient raison !”

“Toutes les religions ont raison, à leur manière,” j'ai dit. “Viens, marchons.”

Tu m'as suivi alors que nous avancions à travers le vide. “Où allons-nous ?”

“Nulle part en particulier,” j'ai dit. “C'est juste agréable de marcher pendant qu'on parle.”

“Alors, à quoi ça sert, du coup ?” tu as demandé. “Quand je serai né à nouveau, je serai comme une ardoise vierge, c'est ça ? Un bébé. Et donc, toutes mes expériences, et tout ce que j'ai fait dans cette vie ne compteront plus.”

“Pas du tout !” j'ai dit. “Tu possèdes en toi toutes les connaissances, toutes les expériences de toutes tes vies passées. Tu ne t'en souviens pas pour le moment, c'est tout.”

J'ai arrêté de marcher et je t'ai pris par les épaules. “Ton âme est plus grandiose, plus belle, plus gigantesque que tout ce que tu peux imaginer. Un esprit humain ne pourra jamais contenir plus qu'une toute petite partie de ce que tu es. C'est comme de mettre ton doigt dans un verre d'eau pour voir si c'est chaud ou froid. Tu y mets une toute petite partie de toi, et quand tu la reprends, tu en retires toutes les expériences qu'elle avait.”

“Tu as été dans un humain pendant les 48 dernières années, donc tu ne t'es pas encore étendu, pour sentir le reste de ton immense conscience. Si nous restions ici assez longtemps, tu commencerais à te souvenir de tout. Mais il n'y a pas d'intérêt à faire ça entre chaque vie.”

“Combien de fois ai-je été réincarné, alors ?”

“Oh, des tas. Des tas et des tas. Et dans des tas de vies différentes.” J’ai dit. “Cette fois, tu seras une petite paysanne dans la Chine de 540 av. J.-C.”

“Attendez, quoi ?” tu as balbutié. “Vous me renvoyez dans le passé ?”

“Bon, oui, techniquement, je suppose. Le temps, comme tu le connais, n'existe que dans ton univers. Les choses sont différentes, de là d'où je viens.”

“D'où venez-vous ?” tu as dit.

“Oh, bien sûr,” j'ai expliqué “je viens de quelque part. Quelque part ailleurs. Et il en a d'autres comme moi. Je sais que tu voudrais savoir comment c'est, là-bas, mais honnêtement tu ne comprendrais pas.”

“Oh,” tu as dit, un peu déçu. “Mais attendez. Si je me réincarne en d'autres temps, j'ai pu interagir avec moi-même, parfois.”

“Bien sûr. Ça arrive tout le temps. Et comme dans chacune de tes vies, tu n'es conscient que de ta propre existence, tu ne sais même pas que ça arrive.”

“Alors à quoi ça sert ?”

“Sérieusement ?” j'ai demandé. “Sérieusement ? Tu me demandes de t'expliquer le sens de la vie ? Ça fait pas un peu cliché ?”

“D'accord, mais c'était une question raisonnable,” tu as insisté.

Je t'ai regardé dans les yeux. “Le sens de la vie, la raison pour laquelle j'ai créé cet univers tout entier, est que tu murisses.”

“Vous voulez dire l'humanité ? Vous voulez que l'humanité murisse ?”

“Non, juste toi. J'ai créé cet univers uniquement pour toi. À chaque vie tu grandis, tu deviens plus mur et ton intellect s'agrandit, s'élargit.”

“Seulement moi ? Mais alors, tous les autres ?”

“Il n'y a personne d'autre,” j'ai dit. “Dans cet univers, il n'y a que toi et moi.”

Tu m'as regardé fixement. “Mais tous les autres gens sur terre...”

“Tous toi. Différentes incarnations de toi.”

“Attendez... Je suis tout le monde!?”

“Ah, voilà, tu commences à comprendre,” j'ai dit, ponctuant ma phrase d'une tape de félicitations sur le dos.

“Je suis tous les êtres humains qui ont existé ?”

“Ou qui existeront, oui.”

“Je suis Abraham Lincoln ?”

“Et tu es John Wilkes Booth, aussi”, j'ai ajouté.

“Je suis Hitler ?” tu as dit, consterné.

“Et tu es les millions qu'il a tués.”

“Je suis Jésus ?”

“Et tu es ceux qui l'ont suivi.”

Tu es resté silencieux.

“À chaque fois que tu as pris quelqu'un pour victime,” j'ai dit, “c'est toi que tu prenais pour victime. Chaque acte de gentillesse que tu as fait, c'est à toi que tu l'as fait. Chaque moment gai ou triste qu'un être humain a expérimenté a été, ou sera, expérimenté par toi.”

Tu es resté pensif un long moment.

“Pourquoi ?” tu as dit. “Pourquoi faire tout ça ?”

“Parce qu'un beau jour, tu deviendras comme moi. Parce que c'est ce que tu es. Tu es l'un des miens, mon fils.”

“Ouah,” tu as dit, incrédule. “Vous voulez dire que je suis un dieu ?”

“Non. Pas encore. Tu es un foetus. Tu es encore en train de grandir. Une fois que tu auras vécu toutes les vies humaines à travers tout le temps, tu auras assez grandi pour naître.”

“Alors tout l'univers,” tu as dit, “c'est seulement... ”

“Un oeuf.” J’ai répondu. “Allez, maintenant il est temps pour toi de passer à ta vie suivante.”

Et je t'ai envoyé sur ta route.

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